What could it be?
Tell me what it is
That one thing that I want
Am I causing trouble?
Or am I just fooling myself?
Trying to run away
Because I can be happy
at what I thought would be best
and yet I cry after?
I am sorry.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
The misty cold day
Sitting on a very high cliff. It was three but the sun forgets to shine and the misty cloudy day began. The cold wind kissed me as I look at the depth below. The calm yet worry ocean goes forever as my feet sways in the rythym of the day cool wind.
I blankly stare at a purple flower that I am holding as the cold wind grows stronger. The green grass feels like cotton in my hand. My hair has been dancing with the cold wind and feels like it has it's own life.
I keep on staring at the ocean's unending horizon until I can't see where it ends while I am holding the purple flower in my head and the cold wind's dancing with my long black hair. It's about to rain. The rain clouds started to peek in the corner of the sky. I keep on sitting. I keep on waiting until the sun comes. Until he comes.
I blankly stare at a purple flower that I am holding as the cold wind grows stronger. The green grass feels like cotton in my hand. My hair has been dancing with the cold wind and feels like it has it's own life.
I keep on staring at the ocean's unending horizon until I can't see where it ends while I am holding the purple flower in my head and the cold wind's dancing with my long black hair. It's about to rain. The rain clouds started to peek in the corner of the sky. I keep on sitting. I keep on waiting until the sun comes. Until he comes.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
The hope in waiting
I believe in love. I believe in fairy tales. Of the "and they live happily ever after". I believe in happy endings and I believe in love hopes all things.
Sometimes when you love, you don't see other things but that one person you wan to reach all your life.
Love has it's own time table. He has his own time frame and he will take you by surprise and when you least expecting it, it suddenly comes.
It's not that I've experienced love at that level but I say that I have some stories to share. One thing that I've learned through life is that when a woman love, she truly loves. It's too painful for her if the fairy tale she started to build suddenly crashes down, she can't find any logical reason to run away from the pieces of the shattered story she loved dearly. Instead, she'll stay and pick it up even though it hurts to pick up broken glasses.
She hopes that one day the bleeding hands won't bleed anymore and pain will just stops from coming. She hopes in love. One at a time. Love.
Sometimes when you love, you don't see other things but that one person you wan to reach all your life.
Love has it's own time table. He has his own time frame and he will take you by surprise and when you least expecting it, it suddenly comes.
It's not that I've experienced love at that level but I say that I have some stories to share. One thing that I've learned through life is that when a woman love, she truly loves. It's too painful for her if the fairy tale she started to build suddenly crashes down, she can't find any logical reason to run away from the pieces of the shattered story she loved dearly. Instead, she'll stay and pick it up even though it hurts to pick up broken glasses.
She hopes that one day the bleeding hands won't bleed anymore and pain will just stops from coming. She hopes in love. One at a time. Love.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
You say you are this, say it again.
There are tons of things that I really don't understand. Many things that I already know, but really don't understand. There are things that I am taught not to do, where in fact I know I must do.
Ironic as it may sound but that's what I've been living all my life. They say that I am a headstrong woman who doesn't care about people. That I would always do what I like to do and care less about those people who may have get hurt in the process.
I haven't understood life, experienced life like this way before. This is like a new shore, a new ocean, a new surrounding and a new sky for me. All have been working together to help me understand the meaning of my existence on earth.
I have been too sheltered at home, at church and with my friends. Too sheltered that somehow it made me too vulnerable with the roughness of life coming rushing through me. Learning and understanding are two different things that people have to really know. I may have learned tons of "right" things but I may never understood any of it. I may not be strong enough to act on what I thought is right. Too weak to take my own action. Too afraid to fail.
Whatever happens, it happens for a reason. Whatever may come, will come for one purpose. You cannot find the purpose why, or what you're living for, unless you know how to live what you are designed to live to.
God bless everyone! :)
Ironic as it may sound but that's what I've been living all my life. They say that I am a headstrong woman who doesn't care about people. That I would always do what I like to do and care less about those people who may have get hurt in the process.
I haven't understood life, experienced life like this way before. This is like a new shore, a new ocean, a new surrounding and a new sky for me. All have been working together to help me understand the meaning of my existence on earth.
I have been too sheltered at home, at church and with my friends. Too sheltered that somehow it made me too vulnerable with the roughness of life coming rushing through me. Learning and understanding are two different things that people have to really know. I may have learned tons of "right" things but I may never understood any of it. I may not be strong enough to act on what I thought is right. Too weak to take my own action. Too afraid to fail.
Whatever happens, it happens for a reason. Whatever may come, will come for one purpose. You cannot find the purpose why, or what you're living for, unless you know how to live what you are designed to live to.
God bless everyone! :)
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